I would like to jar this particular cloud of poo steam I have trapped beneath my comforter. It has a sweetness to it, not unlike Splenda-infused air. I wish to savor this at another time. Well, I moved and that succulent stench swam away. The anus giveth and the atmosphere taketh away...

My farts are so frequent and smell so bad tonight that my wife cancelled sex and plans to sleep on the couch. A mix of sulphur & skunk, with a healthy dose of poo, at a rate of one fart every 3 minutes.

What really gives me a lot of stinky gas are jamba juice drinks. I guess it must be from all the carbohydrates or something. Whenever I have one on my break at work, I begin farting on the sales floor within half an hour. When a customer has a questions and says "Excuse me, sir . . .", I want to say back, "No excuse ME!"

Yesterday I had this 'red tea' which is 'rooibos.' It's the aged twigs and leaves of some south african shrub that doesn't resemble tea at all but is one of the most distinct beverage experiences ever. However here I am on the pot dropping some old friends of mine off at the pool, but today the old friends have a new and distinctive odor. Wow.

After a night of sushi, egg nog, and a bottle of tequila, my bowels were aching to be released this morning. The smell was insane, like fresh newborn baby diaper poo - it was almost fruity.

guinness farts have distinctive odor just like guinness shits. in fact, many different varieties of booze have different fart/shit smells. for example, tequila, bourbon, and pabst blue ribbon are all distinct.